CAST OF GROWN UPS 2 MOVIE
CAST OF GROWN UPS 2 DRIVER

There is a scene that involves Colin Quinn attempting to fix a soft-serve ice cream dispenser, in which it appears the chocolate ice cream squirts out from his ass. They engage in extended handshakes, make racial and homophobic jokes, and deliver maybe the worst dialogue ever written for a major studio film, including at one point calling the townspeople “fart heads.” FART HEADS.ġ7. A blonde Milo Ventimiglia and Taylor Lautner play the villainous frat boys. Spade makes some kind of joke about being trapped briefly inside of his asshole, which to be honest, is a better place to be than inside a theater screening Grown Ups 2.ġ6. A naked Kevin James, leaping from the cliff, lands testicle first on David Spade’s head. Adam Sandler belly flops on his testicles. The four leads are forced to cliff dive naked. At one point, he makes out with her bicep. That same woman is David Spade’s girlfriend. How is it that she allowed herself to make bad jokes of a homophobic nature?ġ4. Maya Rudolph suggests that her G-string is actually a jockstrap and makes several insinuations that she has a penis. There’s a running joke about a musclebound woman who looks like Hulk Hogan. The wives in the yoga class, meanwhile, slobber all over the yoga instructor (Oliver Hudson), and at one point, Maya Rudolph asks if she can “stick my tongue all the way down your throat.”ġ3. Likewise, he gets off on the ballet instructor. Jon Lovitz plays a perverse janitor, who arrives at a yoga class early to lead the women in simulated sex acts, while he gazes upon them lasciviously. The husbands all anxiously attend a little girls’ ballet recital so as to gawk at the cleavage of the ballet instructor, in front of their wives, who are oh-so-appropriately understanding and even encouraging.ġ2.

CAST OF GROWN UPS 2 MOVIE

It’s one of several times during the movie we are given close-ups of men in short shorts and the outline of their testicles.ġ1. During a gym class, Dan Patrick - in short shorts - climbs a rope in such a way that the audience is given a close-up look at his testicle brain. The Meadows’ spawn is also some kind of rapping Urkel.ġ0. There’s a running gag involving Tim Meadows’ family, all of whom have Ronald McDonald baldness, and all of whom attempt to introduce a “WHUUUUUUUT” catchphrase. The sneeze/burp/fart combinations are lessĩ. David Spade does it once, and Adam Sandler does it once right before he has sex with his wife, Salma Hayek. Kevin James does a combination sneeze/burp/fart four times during the movie. During this entire time, Swardson’s drug-fueled split personalities yell at each other.ħ. During an extended product placement for K-Mart, Nick Swardson strips to his boxers, takes a nap in one of their demo beds, and when he wakes up, he walks over and takes a dump in a demo toilet.

CAST OF GROWN UPS 2 DRIVER

After the blitzed-out bus driver played by Nick Swardson passes out and Adam Sandler takes over bus driving duties, the school children stick Cheetos in Swardson’s nostrils. The toddler son of Maya Rudolph and Chris Rock craps his diaper and affords his mother an excited poop dance, as though he has just scored a touchdown in the Super Bowl.ĥ. David Spade’s character gets inside of a Monster Truck-sized tire, and during a six or seven-minute scene during which I aged three years, the tire rolls down a hill, destroying everything in its path until it bounces off of Shaquille O’Neal and falls quietly on its side, at which point, Spade projectile vomits 15 feet across the road and onto a nearby police officer.Ĥ. In the extended sequence, the elk interrupts Adam Sandler’s son in the shower masturbating, and urinates all over him, as well.ģ. In the opening scene, a frightened elk inside of Adam Sandler’s bedroom urinates about six gallons of piss all over Sandler’s face.Ģ. If you choose, however, to see Grown Ups 2, these are the images that you will be forced to endure.ġ. It is a bowl of dicks crammed into a bag of assholes trapped inside of a black hole of stupidity. There is nothing salvageable in Grown Ups 2. Adam Sandler is working under the belief that, if he puts his name on the poster and surrounds himself with enough familiar faces, people will watch without any concern whatsoever for what is actually on the screen. There is only the pain of knowing that each scene will, unfortunately, be followed by another scene, and each subsequent scene will force you to confront the decisions you made in your life that led you to this place, watching a poorly improvised pastiche of sketches - many of them abandoned due to indifference - featuring actors who simply do not care. There is not a single redeeming moment in the film. It’s been nine years, this month since I was subjected to Grown Ups 2.

Cast of grown ups 2